New Year Resolutions

First and foremost - Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had a good one... This year's resolutions..hm..:

1)  Continue to love God, my family and all my friends...but even more

2)  Lose 15lbs

3)  Try to be more motivated about law (that's mission impossible)

4)  Eat more healthily i.e. less kebabs and chips

5)  Improve in my cooking

6)  Take better care of myself (really need that)

7)  Do more exercises and tone up

8)  Be more careful with my spending - money management

9)  Get my sleeping sorted

10)  To share my passion for music with those I love more openly and pick up composing again.

xCx

Currently Listening Back to Bedlam By James Blunt Goodbye My Lover see related

Apology to Jay, "Goodbye My Lover", 15 things I hate

Jay I really would have posted an entry about your birthday weekend by now but there's something wrong with my phone's software and I can't upload my photos from my phone...so I owe you a BIG one and you have my word here on xanga... I will post it up as soon as I get them sorted!  I"M SOOOOOO SORRY!

I went up to Nottingham today to see Jenny 'cause she's leaving on Friday and I really wanted to see her before she goes back home for the month... I didn't arrive until 4pm so I was literally only there for 4 hours: had dinner then left.  Oh well, the whole point was just to spend some time with the girl and that was all that mattered to me.  

As I was on the train on my way back down to Birmingham, I was struck by one of those really emotional moments when a song came on my ipod.  It has happened before but the last time was a quite a while ago, and I was genuinely surprised by how unexpected that was.  Was it one those moments when true feelings creeped out? 

It was James Blunt's "Goodbye My Lover".

 I've listened to it so many times and although I've always felt something special towards its tune and lyrics, I never thought it would hit me so hard.  Tears started streaming down my face unstoppably as I stared out of the window, I couldn't even figure out what was running through my head at the time... 

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
"Cause I saw the end before we'd begun
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won
So I took what's mine by eternal right
Took your soul out into the night
It may be over but it won't stop there
I am here for you if you'd only care

You touched my heart you touched my soul
You changed my life and all my goals
And love is blind and that I knew when
My heart was blinded by you
I've kissed your lips and held your hand
Shared your dreams and shared your bed
 I know you well I know your smell
I've been addicted to you

Goodbye my lover
Goodbye my friend
You have been the one
You have been the one for me

I am a dreamer but when I wake
You can't break my spirit
It's my dreams you take
And as you move on, remember me
Remember us and all we used to be

I've seen you cry I've seen you smile
I've watched you sleeping for a while
I'd be the father of your child
I'd spend a lifetime with you
I know your fears and you know mine
We've had our doubts but now we're fine
And I love you, I swear that's true
I cannot live without you

Goodbye my lover
Goodbye my friend
You have been the one
You have been the one for me

And still I hold your hand in mine
In mine when I'm asleep
And I will bear my soul in time
When I'm kneeling at your feet

Goodbye my lover
Goodbye my friend
You have been the one
You have been the one for me

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow

It's a beautiful song. Some of you must remember me moaning about how annoying I found James Blunt earlier on in September. But I'm afraid to say that he has really grown on me.  There's something about the imperfection of his voice that makes his music so soulful and personal. I'd love to know what was running through his mind when he wrote this song, 'cause it is this quality which really touched me.

Ok... here it goes...  Things I really hate/dislike in no particular order:

1) People who promise that they'd call or text but never get back to you

2) I enjoy stuffing myself but I hate the consequences of gaining weight

3) My freezing cold hands

4) Players who fool with people's hearts..No one should have the right to do that

5) Old perverts, they should be ashamed of themselves

6) Hearing my voice on a video or a tape... I don't get why it sounds so different when you hear yourself back, but it makes me feel sorry for those around me, cuz I have such an annoying voice!

7) My figure/face

8) An excessive dose of crude jokes. Nothing's good when you get too much of it.  When it comes to crude jokes? It doesn't make you any funnier, it just makes you sick.

9) Heavy rain when I'm walking home; I've embarrassed myself too many times being soaked from head to toe and I'm sorry if you've actually seen me in such a mess.

10) Horror movies! Scares me to death! Mark would tell you how bad I am..even the boys scream when they watch horror movies with me but only because I scream first. I'm the jumpiest person you'll ever meet..Mark even refused to sit next to me in Harry Potter.

11) LIARS

12) People who hang around me but aren't actually interested in knowing who I am.

13) Chinese food markets ~ the smell makes me gag and the sight of everything just hanging out makes me feel faint.

14) Sleazy guys in clubs ~ I don't understand what makes them think that they can have their hands all over girls. That's just desparation to the limit.  Those guys should just know that if they wanna get a girl, being sleazy isn't the way to do it, cuz unless they meet an equally desperate woman, all they'll earn is a kick in the balls.

15) HEIGHTS ~ Erin Jacky Jay and Su would know from last week when we went on a ferris wheel... I was shaking in the queue before we even got on and I was freaked out throughout the entire ride..espeically when ERIN decided to ROCK THAT CAGE!

xCx

Christmas in My 'Little World'

It's nearly Christmas again.  Although it's the time of the year when everyone should be with their families and loved ones, unfortunately, that's not going to be the case fo rme this year.  At the moment I don't even know where exactly I'm going to be for the occasion, but oh well, I guess I can still indulge on the dream of a beautiful Christmas.  This is exactly why it's great to be a dreamer.

On the night of Christmas Eve I'd pray for a white Christmas ('cause I've never had one before!) and I would fall asleep with delicious inscense burning and the sound of distant sleighbells ringing.  When I wake up in the morning I'd be surprised and overwhelmed to find my prayer answered.  I'd stand by my window wrapped up in my warm cosy duvet and be completely captivated by the sheer beauty of God's blessing.  I'd say a prayer at heart and thank God a million times for His wonderful present while smiling to myself and fall in love with what is before my eyes...

The streets would be empty of cars or even any distant sound of car engines.  The pavements would be pristine white, free of foot-prints, like a smooth blanket of icing on a huge cake.  "White Christmas" would be playing in my room and Louis Armstrong's voice would be the sun that brightens up my morning.

As I open my room door I'd find mail from my friends and when I walk down to the living room I'd find my family there waiting with the perfect Christmas roast ready on the table (like my parents have ever cooked a roast in Hong Kong?!). We'd spend an amazing time together stuffing ourselves, unwrapping presents and just chillin in front of the TV.

As dusk approaches my door bell would ring and I'd find a special someone at my doorstep with a single red rose for me.  He'd tell me that he loves me, cares for me and wants to be the one who makes me smile everyday.  Obviously my heart would melt like chocolate but yea that doesn't matter... He'd take me away and somehow, as if he has a magic carpet or something of the kind, we'd end up on top of a mountain looking down on the world and we'd spend the entire night just watching stars...

Some Christmas huh? Oh dear I dream too much I really do... AS IF that would ever happen! Oh well, at least Erin understands when it comes to dreaming about our princes charming. If after reading this you think I'm absolutely insane, I don't blame you..but you really have to know me to understand the way I see things.

Dream on, dream on

xCx